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Week 10 we take a look at Deference – Yielding or deferring to another for the benefit of all involved.

As we look to build the family culture, there may be things that we may have to defer for the greater good. This will require us to think long term.

There may be an idea that may be the best, but it’s not the better. What is in the best interest of the family long term.

The truth is that some of the wisest people understand that overall success can come by way of deference.

I’m reminded of a personal experience that I had. I was coaching and one of my players was having a bad game. We had just gotten a crucial turnover late in the game and were driving for the winning score.

We had time for one last play. We needed a touchdown to win and we were on about the seven-yard line.

I called time out to ensure that everyone was on the same page, because we needed to score. I gave the play, this player who I nicknamed named Cougar, said give the ball to me coach, I will score.

Cougar had been having a bad game, so I was reluctant to give him the ball.

He said, coach I will score.

I looked into the eyes of the other players, they gave their approval and belief that Cougar could get the job down.

I deferred to Cougar and asked him what play do you want to run. He said the play. I said let’s run it, they ran it.

Cougar scored, we won the game and instantly all the bad snaps that Cougar had that day were forgotten.

Deference is selfless, not selfish.

Deference looks at the benefit of all involved and submits to corporate success. Part of the concern that makes deference difficult is the misunderstanding of the power and purpose of deference.

Deference doesn’t mean that a person is weak or timid. It doesn’t mean that a person is less than.

Great leaders understand their own deficiencies and shortcomings. Out of humility and respect they elect to defer to those who are more suited and, in some cases, more experienced for direction in handling situations.

Again, deference is not about inadequacies, deference is birthed out of the humility and respect of a person.

Deference is truly a sign of your strength and being strengthened.

Rev. Demetrius Moffett is Senior Pastor of Orange Church of God-Embassy of Grace, 1911 North 16th Street in Orange.