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We continue to Oneness at week 3 of 30. Affection, expressing care and closeness through an innocent genuine desire for the wellbeing of another.

When people say “I love you” why do we say I love you back? Why is there an expectation for it to be repeated? Have we been taught to say we love without being taught how to truly express love?

We should never give the best of ourselves until we know they want the best for us.

Affection is not about a physical touch, it’s about a level of care that draws to want to be with someone. True affection is not expressed through or by the hand, it comes solely from the heart.

Affection is not about words, it’s about deeds. Yes, it feels good to hear the words “I love you” but what good is that declaration when there are no deeds to confirm it.

Another question I would like to pose, what is true love? Our affections are spawned out of our love. If our view of love is distorted or based on conditions, then our affection will replicate those same characteristics.

If someone sees love as yelling, screaming, degrading and being detrimentally physical, they will express love through affections of the same. We don’t need to learn how to love or hate, these two emotions are a part of human nature. What we have to be taught is how to express it. Unfortunately, the lessons are being taught by dysfunctional instructors in dysfunctional settings.

In expressing affection what is our motivation and intent? Do we express affection simply because of a want to or desire for our family? Do we express affection for our loved ones out of duty? Or, do we express affection towards our loved ones because we appreciate them for being who they are and who we are?

Affection has a true motive and that is to have an affect, an expression that makes a difference to produce or influence an emotional response of assurance of the relationship that breeds and brings closeness, safety, stability and security without the pressure of repayment.

Affection is that expression that communicates to our loved ones that we love and respect them and are happy to have them part of our lives.

The next time we say “I love you” let’s be doers also and not hearers only.

 

Rev. Demetrius Moffett is Senior Pastor of Orange Church of God-Embassy of Grace, 1911 North 16th Street in Orange.