OPINION: Story Over a Cup: It’s a strange world out there

Published 6:34 am Wednesday, October 27, 2021

Michael Cole
Story Over A Cup

I have been wanting to try something new at my website. I enjoy writing about my home life and especially my dogs, but I want to add a little humor.

I am a fan of knowing bizarre things, strange events in history, current events, and the like.

So, I am thinking of adding in strange news I come across from time to time.

Anyway, I have a couple gems I am sharing this week while I sip a warm cup of coffee.

Imagine you are hiking in the mountains of Colorado.

My wife would immediately stop as this story is impossible since she doesn’t do nature.

But, on with the story. You are hiking and you are lost. Not a little lost, but totally lost.

Your cell phone however works and you make a few calls. Hoping one of your friends can help.

They call local police and a search is mounted for the hiker.

A search which would last nearly 24 hours. When authorities learn that the hiker had returned to his lodging. A little worse for the wear, but okay.

Angry he had to rescue himself as several search and rescue did not find him.

Apparently, they had tried.

They had his cell number and called him repeatedly to find his location.

He told them he didn’t answer because he did not recognize the number.

I can understand this sentiment, but still.

Another comes from Seattle.

A guy needs gas. His car is nearly empty.

He spies an RV parked in the Walmart parking lot. He decided to syphon off a few gallons. After all, who would notice?

The RV probably carries more than enough.

He grabs his tube. Then pops the gas cap and starts to suck on the hose to create suction to start the syphon.

He gags. He screams.

Later on, police find him and call the owner. The owner refused to press charges.

After all, it is not every day that a would-be thief tries to syphon from the black water tank.

And my coffee cup will allow me for one more nice newsy tidbit to make you think.

Kellogg’s pop-tarts are being sued for deceptive marketing practices.

You might think the person suing thinks pop-tarts are being marketed as a healthy snack when this rectangle diabetes inducing pastries are nowhere near it.

No, she is suing because the strawberry pop-tarts also contain apples and pears.

Her legal brief points out “consumers seek snacks which are a ‘healthy indulgence,’ which is a ‘a treat with all the flavor and taste desired, without the guilt of eating something ‘bad’ for you,’ due to the presence of ingredients known to confer positive health benefits.”

She argues the label of strawberries, which she claims has more health benefits than apples or pears, is misleading and that Kellogg is engaging in deceptive practices of mislabeling.

Even though on the package there is a label stating that pears and apples are included as well.

I have no words here. Other than it is a shame Kellogg mixes in apples and pears with strawberries together and then puts a smidge of the sugary jelly substance between two thick pastries which are dunked into enough sugary icing that I get a high blood sugar just looking at it.

But let’s not forget how healthy the strawberries are.

We aren’t gonna make it, are we?

 

Michael Cole is a syndicated columnist that when he is not writing, he is plotting global domination or bathing dogs. You can follow him at www.storyoveracup.com