Quinn Minute – A nine-foot-long rodent?

Published 12:32 am Monday, September 20, 2021

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by Rix Quinn

     A guy named Dan asks, ”Is it really true that scientists found a fossil of a nine-foot-long rat?”

     Dan, this report — like my first job application — is mostly true. Actually, the monster mouse measured nine feet long, many times the size of my gerbil Gerald.

     I asked Gerald what he knew. Gerald claims he’s heard about several rats in history, but thinks most of them were much smaller than a rhinoceros.

     This giant rodent lived nearly eight million years ago. Fortunately for 21st century people, the animal is now quite sincerely fossilized.

     Scientists say this beast had huge teeth, a long tail, and weighed as much as a buffalo. This would make him a formidable foe, but a poor dancer.

     What did he eat? I am not sure, but I suspect the answer is “anything he wanted.”

     Earlier scientific expeditions to that same region found bones of several huge reptiles, including one eight-foot turtle shell and a bunch of gigantic crocodiles.

     Researchers also discovered the teeth of a giant mammal. We’re not sure what it was, but you wouldn’t want it for a house pet.

     Why did those massive rats disappear? No one is sure, but here is a guess:

     Real, real, real big cats.

     BEST MEMORY? – Tell us about the BEST MEMORY you have. We are looking for something UNIQUE, like making a great discovery, or getting to talk to a famous celebrity. Call Rix at 817-920-7999, or e-mail him at rix@rixquinn.com, with the word MEMORY in the “Subject” line.