OP-ED: Story Over a Cup: What’s in a name

Published 6:53 am Wednesday, June 9, 2021

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Michael Cole
Story Over A Cup

What’s in a name? that which we call a rose By any other name would smell as sweet;

Bill Shakespeare (Romeo & Juliet Act II: Scene II)

So, I decided to start this column with a quote from Bill.

Shakespeare, not my dog.

It is something that has been swirling around my mind for the past few days.


More importantly business names.

What goes into the naming of a business? I can understand the mom-and-pop stores, like “Leslie the Midnight Baker,” or “Shon’s Tractor and Lawn Service.”

These proprietors put their name on the business so you know who is the person behind it. You are receiving personal attention from an expert.

But what about the bigger ones? Even then you have some idea of what they do.

Tractor Supply sells farm and ranch supplies. Hence the tractor name.

The Home Depot sells stuff related to your home.

Granger Chevrolet sells things concerning Chevrolet.

And so on.

But it still kinda makes me wonder.

And then others have something in the name that corresponds to their area of expertise.

Bank, Trust, Fiduciary, Financial, Media, and so on.

First Fiduciary and Trust.

First National Trust Bank, Bar and Grill.

And so on.

I understand these names inspire a sense of trust in their money skills. I mean, I am not going to feel safe using “Fred’s Bank”

Why do so many banks have “First” in the name?

What’s so good about saying you are first in the banking and finance field?

Are you saying you are first in service, or the first one to open?

Me being me, if I were to open a bank, I would call it, and wait for it…

The Millionth Bank

The advertising would write itself, “We are just like the 999,999 banks opened in front of us. Give us your money!”

And maybe I am overthinking the whole name thing.

Maybe somewhere there is this secret name generator that you have to put a coin in when you incorporate your business.

Like Carvana.

You drop the coin in and your Articles of Incorporation pop out along with a name generator.

At the name generator you are asked to give nouns, adjectives, and other words like an Ad Lib.

Enter a noun: bank

Enter an adjective: trust

Enter a color: blue

Okay, now a season: fall

Hit the final button, and your name is generated.

Bill’s Blue Bank Hookah Emporium Trust and Fall Swimwear Inc.


Michael Cole is a syndicated columnist that when he is not writing, he is plotting global domination. You can follow him at www.storyoveracup.com