Talking About Parenting: Conflicts arise over expectations

Published 8:26 pm Wednesday, September 26, 2018

By Chris Kovatch


The first six weeks of this school year has wrapped up and it has been an interesting return to the school year routine.

Thayer believes his 2nd grade education is sufficient; Stryker believes the school day is too long; and Summer sees the whole school day as an opportunity for social interaction.

Needless to say, we may have had a few conflicts arise over expectations for the school year.

Growing up, I always view college as an expectation not an option. I approached it with the same attitude that I approached any grade level growing up. These days, though, college doesn’t always end up being a wise use of resources.

My children know that education past high school is an expectation. Dependent on their career choice, the actual routes will likely vary greatly.

If Rosie wants to take over the dance studio, I would much rather have her train in New York or Los Angeles and take business classes that directly impact her running the studio.

Part of the equation for post high school education is their actual high school performance.

Could I have tried hard in high school? You bet. I ended up ranked 11th in my graduating class, which equated to the top 5-percent. Not too shabby.

These days I have been struggling on a variety of different levels to help my kids understand the importance of their performance. I know that this realization must be reached by them and they must make the decision to try.

I can push all I want-which I do-but in the end, they have to make up their own minds.

Their struggles to perform vary greatly from child to child. One is able to pick things up so easily but doesn’t routinely make the effort and another carries such self-doubt about their abilities.

Education is a struggle, but is something that we are so fortunate to receive. It is not a right, but a privilege. There are so many children throughout the world that will never be able to escape into a book or that will be able pursue their dreams of being a doctor.

I hold my children accountable for their performance. They are all different and I have different expectations of each. The one thing I am sure of is that they all have greatness in them, and I hope that I am able to help them realize and believe this. The truly are capable of anything and I want to help them become the person they want to be.