Do not give up on love

Published 5:53 am Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Editorial by Mary Ekene

Why do people fall in love? Why do people fall out of love? These are two questions that have been around for centuries. Unlike the days of old, couples stayed together longer because marriage and relationships meant something. People were not so quick to give up, to lash out, and to hurt one another so hatefully. Back then taken vows MEANT something, simply saying I LOVE YOU meant something.

But now we often see that marriages and having relationships are a joke. Couples want to lay, cheat, manipulate, and hurt each other. We are so quick to throw in the towel because of fear and insecurities. What happened to fighting for the person we love, making sure they are happy, making sure they feel wanted. No one wants to put in the work anymore, so we just go through life unhappy and wondering “what if’.

How do I know about this repetitious subject about ‘LOVE’, I have lived it. I was in a marriage for 6 years and I was very unhappy. I did everything to keep that man happy, but he chose alcohol as his wife, children, and happiness. It came to a point where I became cold and bitter. I told myself I would never fall in love again. I told myself I do not believe in love. I had given up simply because I gave my marriage my best shot and in the end it ended in a divorce.

Then of course, out of a no where I became reunited with an old friend. He was someone I could talk about anything with. He was funny yet serious, sincere yet stubborn, very giving yet distant. I soon came to know he had been hurt in his past relationships too. That was our common ground for us, hurt. But as we reunited and discussed old days, we started hanging around a lot and then it happened. Yes, I fell in love. I asked myself ‘Mary what are you doing? do not do it, do not fall in love with this man.” But of course it was too late.

We decided to be in a relationship and it has been about a year and were still together. Of course we have our ups and downs, what couple does not. But I know it is a challenge for me because I am learning to trust again and that is not easy. I am learning to let someone in again.

To all my married couples, couples in a relationship DO NOT GIVE UP ON THE PERSON WHO LOVES YOU. Yes there will be challenges, yes you will get hurt, but if you learn to trust the person you are with, respect them on every level and genuinely love them, you can overcome anything. Because of what I went through in my past marriage, I saw I brought them into my relationship and I ended up hurting someone I love very much.

So again love each other and grow together. To the man I love Eric Hatcher, thank you for being you. Life is too short everyone; live every day to the fullest.