By Michael Cole

We do not always get what we want.

It is an ever so sad but true story.

However, there are times in which we beat ourselves up over trying and failing.

Why?

I can admit that as a human being (I know some of you doubt I am), it is an inner drive to reach that next hurdle, to strive for the brass ring.

Unfortunately, others are reaching for that same brass ring. Trying to be the first to cross the finish line.

That is life.

Little we can do about changing that.

But that does not stop the tears when we fail. That knot in the pit of our stomach when we realize that months, possibly years of hard work and dedication was just not enough to cross the finish line.

We were not all meant to win every time. Sometimes someone else’s drive and determination are a little stronger, a little more disciplined.

So on that particular day, they get the brass ring.

We do not always get what we want.

Or, the line I love the use from Disney’s Mulan, “We cannot all be acupuncturists!”

Its true, we will not all be doctors or lawyers. We will not all make it from the local stage to the big game.

Only a few will make it all the way to the top.

That’s okay.

I went to High School at West Orange-Stark. There in the 90s, even the cheerleaders had more football talent than some of the other teams. That meant that the competition to make the team was fierce.

The players pushed themselves to achieve because they knew that Coach Hooks had a dozen others that could replace an underperforming player.

But the ones that did not make the team could still hold their head high knowing that they at least tried out.

And that was the critical thing. They tried.

It reminds me in my life of two essential lessons.

Trying and failing is far better than not trying and failing.

I found out that trying and failing at least lets you look in the mirror and say that you went for it. You gave it your all and still failed. It is nothing to be ashamed of, ever.

I ran for Congress three times. I failed three times. The last one was so heartbreaking for the fact that if just fifteen thousand votes went the other way, I would be a member of Congress.

I am disappointed that I failed, but not disappointed I tried.

I met new people, learned new things, and most of all discovered things about myself and others that I never knew before.

I can look around at the haters and naysayers and say while they complained and threw shade from the background, I tried to make a change.

I have branched off into other interests, and am very happy with my life.

Another is a lesson in my life of failing because I did not try.

We all deep down are like Charlie Brown.

I think growing up; I was a bit more like that than I would like. Classmates can attest to the fact that of all the Charlie Browns in the world, I was the Charlie Browniest.

I was wishy-washy, nerdy, full of doubt and introverted as they came.

I still tried to kick the football, and I still had my red-headed girl I pined for (though she didn’t have redhead). But since I was who I was, I never had the guts to say anything to her.

And so, other than somewhat friends, that chance not taken is an automatic loss.

Not that I regret my life since then. I have a life that I am content with and very happy. A wife I would not trade for anything.

But still, late at night, like everyone else, I wonder I what would have happened if Lucy had not pulled the ball away at the last minute.

The point is that life will choose a path for you, even if you will not.

You can reach for your dreams, and risk failure. Or you can do nothing and wonder for the rest of your life what would have happened had you tried for the brass ring.

That is my lesson to those reading this today, and one person in particular. My advice to you is that it is far, far better to live with the defeat of having tried than the regret of never having tried.

And who knows, it might be your day to grab the brass ring.